Own your achievements
Male overconfidence is real (e.g. men are four times more likely to ask for a pay rise and, according to Arizona State University, claim to be more intelligent than is statistically possible!). By contrast, women tend to report their achievements realistically. A woman owning her achievements quietly feeds her ambition and self-respect. Don’t worry that other people will think that you are pushy or sharp-elbowed. Tell the room, ‘That was my idea’ before someone else takes the credit.
Take pride in hard work but resist being the admin
Showing enthusiasm and active engagement, and not being afraid of hard work are all attractive qualities. However, I see the more administrative tasks that need doing defaulting to women, and, all too often, this is self-assigned! Take ownership of the allocation of actions and make sure that others get the admin tasks or ensure that an administrator is identified ahead of time.
Aim to achieve something amazing everyday
Work can be demanding and sometimes requires personal sacrifices. It can often be difficult to measure true progress when you are juggling many priorities and something always ends up ‘not completed’ at the end of your daily list. What I have found that has helped is a mindset that “I am going to achieve at least one amazing thing every day rather than trying to get everything done”. It’s the classic choice of Quality vs Quantity. Of course, it’s unrealistic to be amazing in everything that you do, but focusing on one area in this way can indeed lead to achieving something special. Not only has this mindset inspired me to reach further, aim higher and deliver impact, it has also helped me balance my work with my personal life as a mother of three children.
‘Lean In’ by learning to ask great questions
The pressure to say something really intelligent to contribute in a group meeting is huge. So take the pressure off yourself and practice asking great questions instead. Aim to be a visible and active contributor, and demonstrate interest and respect. Show that you have done the pre-work, thought about the agenda, done the pre-reading. Remember, a good leader is not the one who knows all the answers, but someone who knows how to ask others to get those answers.
Build a team around you to balance your strengths
Be clear about your strengths and what you bring to a task or a team. Being mindful of this, build a team of people who balance out your strengths and cover your blind-spots to achieve a more successful result all round. For example, I know that I can be overly-optimistic, so I often ask for a colleague to provide ‘black hat’ thinking on all the things that could go wrong so we can work them into a solution.
Remember to have fun
Humor is a natural confidence builder. Use humor to take any stress out around a situation and make those around you relax. You spend so much of your waking life working. You need to ensure that you are seeking balance in work, and rest and recovery. There is no point if you are not enjoying the journey!
